home < articles < business tips < principles for understanding people in business situations home < neurocare home < general education < articles < business tips < principles for understanding people in business situations Excerpts from "What They Don't Teach You at Harvard Business School" by Mark McCormack Background What people say and do in the most innocent situations can speak volumes about their real selves. Some people will act one way with subordinates, another with their boss, another with people outside the company. But the real self--one's true nature--can't change color to suit its environment. Sooner or later it will show. So listen. Hear what people are really saying, not what they are telling you. Put someone's deeds in the larger context of character. Preconceived notions People often make judgments about others before meeting them based upon what they've heard or what they know about another's company or actions. Worse still, they'll even mistrust or ignore their own perceptions coming from a personal meeting. In other words, they will make their perceptions from a personal meeting conform to their conclusions made prior to the meeting. Observe There is usually more to see then meets the eye--a whole level of personal dynamics operating just beneath the surface. Look for clues such as: what people say or do unconsciously; their look when asked a question or hearing something (ex. Look away); way they choose to phrase a particular thought. See beyond the present situation. The better you know the person, the more you can get beneath the facades and the more accurately you can predict how they will react or respond in almost any situation. Talk less and observe more. Open up all your senses. Listen aggressively Meet people in person. Listen and observe their dress, body language, etc. Don't be hasty in this. Don't jump to conclusions. Almost any useful observation must be considered in the larger context of the situation and what else you are hearing and seeing. What's the relative importance the person places on form in relation to substance. There's a difference between posture and posturing. Look to see if a person's pose is too perfect. A person's eyes will usually tell you what they're thinking, even when all the other signs are pointing elsewhere. People communicate with their eyes when they can't use words. Look at the eye contact between people. Copyright 2001, Robert I. Winer, M.D.